Roasted Preacher

Directions

1. 1
   Mix thoroughly neglectful church goers along with self-rising hypocrites.
2. 2
   Add the dried deacons, sleepy singers and a pinch of tightwad tithers.
3. 3
   Mixture should be good and lumpy.
4. 4
   Let sit for sermon. Gradually add in jealousy, frozen amens and whispers. These ingredients will make it thick and stiff.
5. 5
   Be sure to use a spoon.
6. 6
   You don't want to miss a crumb.
7. 7
   After all these ingredients are mixed up and sermon is over, add twinkle tongues and fault finders.
8. 8
   This will add a good flavor to the roast.
9. 9
   By this time, your preacher should be cooked, stewed and boiled.
10. 10
    You should now have a well unbalanced roasted preacher.
11. 11
    This recipe is well known throughout the churches today.
12. 12
    It's simple and tasty and you don't even use a stove.
13. 13
    A very weak Christian.