Elephant Stew

Directions

1. 1
   Cut elephant meat into bite size pieces (this will take about two months).
2. 2
   Cut vegetables into cubes (another two months). Place meat in a pan and cover with 1,000 gallons of brown gravy. Simmer for four weeks.
3. 3
   Shovel in salt and pepper to taste.
4. 4
   When meat is tender, add vegetables (a steam shovel or backhoe is useful for this).
5. 5
   Simmer slowly for four more weeks.
6. 6
   Garnish with parsley.
7. 7
   This will serve 3,800 people.
8. 8
   If more people are expected, add 2 rabbits.
9. 9
   I do not recommend this however, as very few people like hare in their stew.